I’ve got a confession to make. This isn’t easy for me to say, and it may change the way some of you think about me. I hope you understand, and once you get over the initial surprise, that you choose to accept me regardless. So here goes:
I… like… New Year’s resolutions.
I don’t just like New Year’s resolutions, I actively think about them. I make them. And just like everybody else, I then fail to stick to them. Usually by the end of January it’s coming into and out of my mind intermittently, and by some point in February it’s gone, placed on a dusty shelf in my mind until the year ends. I’ve come to the conclusion that part of the problem with New Year’s resolutions is that they’re often so vague. For example: I want to get in shape. What shape, will any shape do? Or: I want to be a better person. Better than who/what? Better in what way? You see the problem?
Last year I fell into that trap. My resolution was to change my often cynical, sarcastic and pessimistic attitude to life. That cynicism is why I figured you’d be surprised to hear that I make New Year’s resolutions. I don’t seem like the kind of person that would. Without concrete goals though, that resolution is almost impossible to define, and therefore to achieve.
I did make some progress. I learned to give compliments and positive feedback, and that didn’t come naturally. I’ve developed a taste for upbeat pop music, and that’s good. My biggest change though was to switch my degree at university from one that deals almost entirely with the negative, to one that, to my mind at least, deals with a lot more of the positive.
I always partly doubted whether I wanted to study politics at university, I just couldn’t think of anything else I might want to study instead. That started to change during my time in Siena last year. During the year, two friends from separate places asked me, unprovoked, why I wasn’t studying languages, why politics? I had no good answer to give them, and the idea stayed with me, somewhere at the back of my mind, on the dusty shelf alongside past New Year’s resolutions. But I didn’t act on it because I already had a place at university to study politics. In my mind I wanted to keep correcting imbalances, I wanted to be the advocate for peace, equality, justice, and for Israel.
It took me only one International Relations lecture to realise I couldn’t be that person. It was the first class of the first year, the very basis of the beginning of our first steps in international relations. The lecturer stood in front of 250 of us and gave us an hour long spiel about how the US was a colonial, aggressive, imperialist power. At one point he mentioned Israel/Palestine, and promised “we’ll get to that a bit later on.” I didn’t stick around. Within three days I was attending language classes in German and Italian, learning about new cultures, people, food, and languages in a positive way.
The truth is that talking about politics, especially in our region, thinking about it, reading about it, just drives my blood pressure right up. The number of people I’m willing to talk Middle Eastern politics with these days is very low, I could count them on one hand, and I’d probably still have a few fingers left over. I don’t want to be one of those people who is willing only to talk, and not to listen. Nor do I want to be one of those pointing fingers. There are enough people doing that already. Enough people who think that if they just shout “Arabs are terrorists!” “Israel is an apartheid state!” “Palestinians don’t want peace!” “Israel is carrying out ethnic cleansing!” “The Arabs want to drive us all into the sea!” “Boycott Israel!” often and loudly enough, that’ll make them right, and once they’ll be proven right, everything will somehow work itself out.
I can’t stop people doing that. But I can stop being part of it. There are so many positives to focus on. Instead of giving airtime to BDS racists and settler extremists, I could sate my love of writing and making people laugh in a more positive way.
I watched an interview with Adam Hills (@adamhillscomedy), a comedian with a well-known “nice guy” image, where he talked about realising while performing that telling negative jokes, picking on members of the audience, the things that every comedian does, were having a negative impact. He decided mid show to change his approach, and later went back to his jokes and changed them from things such as “I hate Americans because…” to “I love Americans because…” and realised that the jokes worked just as well. He discovered that the show was equally funny, only now when people left at the end of the show, they were not only laughing, they were also smiling. So that’s what I want to do with this blog. Not stop trying to be funny or sarcastic, but just try to be funny in a more positive way about more positive things. I’m going to change the blog from political issues to anything else. The funny side of learning languages (and there are plenty of them), my love of travelling and seeing new places, adjusting to university as a mature student. There’s no shortage of interesting topics to discuss, so stick around, it should be a blast.
I wish you all a wonderful 2014,
Sahar

